Now, my son doesnt seem to even want me in the room with him any more. Pump or hand express your milk. Play games together with both her and her if needed. I cant seem to find this answer. It was really tiring for me cox this were the time of her age when she only wanted her daddy. everyone will try to get him to say it and he just stares blankly at me, he does not want me to hold him, kiss him, or hug him! Take a deep breath and focus and love and joy when you interact with your daughter. Like many of you, I am a working mother who loves her baby girl more than anything in the world. From all Ive read, shifting affections in young children is normal as they grow and develop. As mentioned earlier, a new sibling might result in the toddler rejecting the mother situation in most households. Please hang in there mommies and daddies. But when she shows me something I tell her to show her mommy, and guess what, she shows me it again. I dont know what to do, I feel desperate. Help?? It may not feel like it right this moment but things will get better. If anything, it will harm the situation more. Ive spent a fortune on psychotherapy and self- help groups, and I still suffer. I think its about time she stood up to her dad & told him but she as always been scared of him just like her older brother scared to say boo. Recently my sis in law has come back after her long leave.. my son of 3 years has totally changed seeing his aunt.. since she is at home now, i leave my son with her when i am at work.. Sometimes the distraction of being outside together will help so that she does not focus on dad being away. Going by the earlier posts, my problem is likely due to my travel job. Hi Im a step father an I have a little boy who is 2 now an I been in his life since he was three months old. If your baby is younger than one year, even if she seems to be losing interest in breastfeeding, chances are she is not yet ready to wean. Fellow mommy Im very concerned about you. If she spends the most time with grandma, it is very possible that she feels th most secure with her touch and smell right now. I know you'll be great. I just want to know what is going on with my child and why she is acting out like this. A more upright position makes it easier for the milk to go "down the hatch.". 5 points to consider when deciding whether returning to work after maternity leave is right for you: 1. Many babies go through periods when only one of the parents will do it can be either the mom or the dad. I hope its just a phase. My 3 year old seems to resent her dad. Maybe it is time for both you and her to have a break. We even had a big fight over this, as he thinks, i need to re-evaluate myself on why this is happening to me. they will be happy, more emotionally-healthy adults because of the love we giveeven if they seem to ignore it now, they need us. Hi all, please help im worried that she might endup hating him. I have an 8-month-old little girl and she does the same thing to me! Then try some of these methods: 1. I always thought it was because I am a working mum but it seems that even stay home mums have this problem. Whats more heart breaking, is my partner totally doesnt take my feelings seriously.& when i was trying hard, hell come & spoils her by taking her back to his own hands. My 9-month-old daughter has started recently. Its putting a lot of strain on our relationship. you can see that she love him , but when she sees him its another story . I had the same with my daughter, which happened at maybe 7 or 8 months. Even worse, today my husband and I took her to the baby classes, she suddenly refused me to hold her and wanted my husband only. Again research has shown that children who are picked up often, carried around if they ask for it, and so on, become secure enough to leave their parents arms faster than the children who are not allowed to be close to their parents. It isn't exactly easy, balancing the needs of your child with likely way less sleep than you're used to, while trying to be the same employee you were before you left. Cafemom wanted a detailed truth about returning to work after having a baby. My mother in law lives in my basement suite and looks after my son 2 days a week, my mom looks after him 1 day a week. Its the biggest deal imaginable to that baby. wont she not even a day look out for me. For you who have to work, find as much time as possible to spend with your daughter. Children are not there to build our self-esteem, they cant and often wont, especially if we expect them to act in a certain way, or to be thankful or loving, because we treat them well. I am so happy that my two main men have such a great relationship, but I want to share in it too! Which just doesnt help at all! What can I do? Join her in her happiness when dad come home and let her know that her love of dad is OK. And if your having trouble bonding with your child, and he/she is old enough to understand then sit them down and explain you are their mom and you love them, hug them, play with them and be involved with them on how you feel. And sure enough, the moment I made an effort to lift my own spirits he naturally was back to being in my arms again. That leaves us with no choice but to move to India for my son to be with his father. What he really needs might be to have more fun and more time with his dad. I hope you've enjoyed today's post! Finances will play a huge factor on whether you decide to go back to work from maternity leave. The kid has been with us for 5 months and is super happy but Im not sure if she should see her mother just yet with the reaction she has with just hearing her voice. Consider your overall financial picture. When you feed her, take your top off or at least pull it up even if you bottle-feed. should i just let her be with whoever she wants to be with? While he seems to love me insofar as he smiles at me and reaches for me, he doesnt really notice if I leave to go in to another room or whatever. I can understand that your sons behavior is making you sad. At this, understanding and accepting a no simply is beyond her. I dont get it. My daughter is nearly six months old and she gets really grumpy with me. Lots of hugs and squeezes, even when she is wriggling and squirming. Or has anyone here experienced their toddler crying when they hear the parents voice on the phone and they are fine once they see them? Take care of yourself during this time. it has been like this for over a year now & i now just resent them. Ask your employer if something like this is an option. Employees who have access to these benefits express 1.5 times greater work satisfaction and are 2.5 times less likely to miss . But unless one is emotionally stable, it can be almost impossible. Im the mother who wrote nearly a year ago that my baby boy didnt seem to love me, I posted later that things seemed to be improving and now, at 18 months, I feel absolutely loved by my son. May God help us all. there were times that she slept with my caretaker before i got home to take her to our room could it be this? Of course we can go the road of power struggles, but it wont help. Playing with her, cuddling her, holding her, rocking her to sleepif I could sing her to sleep it was rare. Pin it or frame it at a place where you can give a quick look. It sounds to me as if you really want the best for your son, but that you are to some extent in a vicious circle. I can see other parents are having similar problems, so maybe it is something she will grow out of in time. It is hard. I feel like she associates me with all things bad (i.e. Actually, I wouldnt be surprised if your mother is right. I just left my 4-month-old son for the first time overnight with my parents. Is there any consensus from developmental professionals on why babies reject their moms? It is heart-breaking, what can I do? Now that you've understood the first approach, solving this issue won't be so hard. amitabh bachchan interview 1984; breckenridge mn high school; baby rejecting mom after going back to work. As soon as I pass him to someone else he is quiet immediately. But the emotional part of me feels devastated. Its the school holidays now and its like even though im spending more time with him, there are times he prefers his grandma. Usually at this age, making sure that your child isnt doing anything dangerous (swallowing things, climbing too high, running out in the street, biting himself or other children et cetera) is more or less enough as an ambition. I just persevered like you, and it really did get better. And I really hope that this is just a phase that she is going through. I am sure she wants the best for her daughter, i.e. I sometimes wish that I could die and I admit that there are times when I have seen all my competitors as my enemies and I wanted to hurt my own child out of jealousy..But then I would never do that..My relationship with my husband and his family is degrading day by day..And I regret having married him at all even though he is the best husband and dad ever..I dont know what is happening to me!! I understand so much the pain you are going through. I breastfeed and she doesnt like when I look at her or she will fuss again. It may be because she may be spoiled to the phase of a daddys girl, or it may be you. I rush home to see her and she cries/moans when she sees me I hold my hands out to her and she clings to whoever she is with at the time. His granddad plays with him every minute he gets with him. 2 weeks after I had my baby boy I got Post Partum Depression very very bad but I wasnt pushing my baby away I would feed him and play with him everything that I could do for him not to feel my anxiety and depression I am finally out of this depression but I noticed that my son (11 months) would rather be with his aunt than me. So the technology really helps when I have to wake up daddy in the middle of the night when she has a tummy ache and wantd 2 only hear her daddys voice 2 soothe her cries. So chin up, even when its hard. xxx. I do that almost everyday, and shes fine and enjoys playing with me when were home together; again, its when her Dad comes home or when Grampy and/or Aunt Mel come over that she wants nothing to do with me. but when my wife is around, Im nobody, she wont come to me, no kisses or hugs, she will scream and cry for mum to hold her, especially if I pick her up. I dont usually do online chatting, but I needed to get this off my chest. He will go to my parents or my husband before he would come to me. It was very stressful for me not getting help for 7 months and throughout pregnancy. But he just doesnt seem to need me. I feel terrible when I get home from work and reach out for her and she doesnt want to come with me, we have so much fun together! Lets look at why a baby rejects mom after going back to work, and some helpful tips on what to do about it! She preferred me up until recently. What can i do to get my daughter back? Try movement like rocking 4. I strongly recommend you to get it! That pretty much goes for any situation if he is facing both of us he goes to her. I am considering changing our living situation for various reasons but namely to see if it makes a difference with my relationship with my son. When I think about it, it really is a good thing that she loves her daycare. 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